Black Men : Why baby mama drama is ultimately your own fault.

Enki

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Then you must believe that baby DADDY drama is HER fault as well.
ya see, this is the danger when men are taught not to hit women. She grabbed that pipe with no hesitation and went in on dude. She did this because she knows she can, and if she gets hit back, brutha is the guilty one. Hell you see what happened when he didn't het her back, he got locked up. Who knows what would have happened if he did.

Peace!
 

Enki

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or..

as mama used to say.. 'you lay down with dogs, you wake up with fleas'.. or.. less insultingly..
'you make your bed you gotta lay in it'..

It's mostly definitely his fault.
You know this saying is not always true, don't you? People can change while in a relationship, and the only people that quote this phrase are the one that think they've stepped right everytime in life. We've all made mistakes, and for every mistake, a phrase like this is made for it.

Peace!
 

CosmicMessenger

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She grabbed that pipe with no hesitation and went in on dude. She did this because she knows she can, and if she gets hit back, brutha is the guilty one. Hell you see what happened when he didn't het her back, he got locked up. Who knows what would have happened if he did.

Peace!
Good point.
 

skuderjaymes

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You know this saying is not always true, don't you? People can change while in a relationship, and the only people that quote this phrase are the one that think they've stepped right everytime in life. We've all made mistakes, and for every mistake, a phrase like this is made for it.

Peace!
you know what an idiomatic expression is, don't you? What would give you the impression that each one would be true for every situation?
and listen.. we have not all made the same kinds of mistakes.. and just because the same abstract phrase is used to point at our actions, that does not make our actions equal. Recognize that. A mistake is not a mistake. Context is everything.
 

NyneElementz

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yes I do. But I'm a man posting a discussion topic in the men's forum about the choices men make.
And honestly, it IS the truth. The responsibility does belong to us if we have it. Regardless of her contributions or if she stars the drama, ultimately it boils down to this:

1 - YOU CHOSE HER! You could have just left her alone in the first place.
2 - You didn't discern that there were factors in her character that would cause drama.
3 - You laid down with her before REALLY getting to know her.
4 - You didn't handle the situation with responsibility.

Obviously this is not about assigning blame, brothers, but think about it. If you have baby mamma drama right now, how many times have you thought within yourself, "if I only handled it differently," or "I wish I never got involved with her," etc. We need to make much better choices about our dealings with sisters.
 

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