Violaters / Violations : Un-Civility hurts Destee, from the Stephen A. Smith thread.

JuneBugg

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MEMBER
Jul 29, 2002
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Eventhough I've seen no name calling in this thread, you do have a point. The reason they don't do this is because they can articulate their views without intentionally being injurious to each other. This is the first thing many blacks do when the don't agree with your opinion, is they call you sell-out, and uncle tom. Selling out is also supplying a crutch, and keeping the victim mentality alive and well.

If you walk into an office dressed, and talking like a thug, looking for a job, and you don't get it, it's not your fault, it's Yt fault.

Peace!
I have to disagree on the name calling, James From Philly infer calling people names by using outright lies, exaggerations, and misrepresentations in this thread, this kind of stuff hurts Destee and kills conversations. Now I know back in 2002 why I did not post because back then I felt it was too uncivil and moved on, this is why Destee have rules to encourage civility. This topic is a great example how some try to silence others they disagree with. There is so much talk about what white people do to us but the real problem is what we do to each other, there should be a greater benefit of the doubt and respect among ourselves. We are so quick to think the worst of our own people, attack them, accuse them, try to negatively turn them into a character and that ends participation and finding common ground on future topics. Observers see the uncivil climate and move on.

I don't do the drama stuff, back and forth with nonsense and waste my time on people who think their opinions are the only ones that are valid and have the only valid brand of blackness. They are those who can disagree and be civil and that is really a beautiful thing and it sets a good example of the kind of skills needed to be able to unify and grow based on the great majority of issues we agree on.


In view of the big picture my opinion on Destee does not make a difference so why deal with the frustration with those who can't respect it. There are better ways to spend my time.

I'm done, pissed and disappointed too bad this could not be a groove.

Best of luck and wishes and may peace be with you all.
 

Enki

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Thank you for your comment.

But I must tell you that we have a reporting system because we can't and don't catch everything. If a members feels they are being called names, or disrespected, they are encourage to use the reporting system. That way it can be reviewed, and addressed. Our goal here is to make all feel welcomed the best we can. Also, this board is no different than any other board, there is not rule that says a member has to listen, or even consider your opinion. But all have the right to state their with civility while adhering to the rules. I've been on here long enough to pretty much know how each person posting style is, and while I don't agree with some, it is their style, just like I have mine that I know rubs people the wrong way.

But the key is to be respectful, and learn how to agree to disagree. We all are not going to see eye to eye on every issue....

Peace!
 

Enki

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Here is a link to our rules for this site:

http://destee.com/rules

If you have any questions, don't hesitate to ask me, or any of the mods.

Peace!
 

Destee

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JuneBugg ... awwww ... what happened ... :huh2:

As Brother Enki said ... you gotta report the possible violation to us, in order for it to be addressed.

I don't see where you reported a violation ... not giving us a chance to make the situation right.

We're willing to help do all we can ... if you give us a direct link to the possible violation(s).

Do you have some links ... what posts are you counting as so egregious?

Help us help you ... while helping the community ... give us some links please.

On another note ... YAAAAAAAAAAAAY @ Brother Enki ... great response above ... :toast:

The challenge isn't for us never to have problems ... but to be able to work them out.

Let's work them out ... :weights:

Loving Us! <3

:heart:

Destee
 

Destee

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i was finna go in and try to see what the problem is ... but that thread has 181 posts! ... :research:

even if i tried to see what upset you so ... i'd probably get it wrong ... as what offends you, may not offend me ... so it's really important that Members point specifically to what they find out of order ... so we can speak to it specifically.

Again ... give us some links to specific posts ... we'll surely take a look.

Better yet ... click on the REPORT link found under the post(s) you find offensive.

That REPORT link is under every single post ... making it easy to report any possible violations.

We have yet to receive any reported posts ... but we're waiting ... :pc:

:heart:

Destee
 

Deacs

Well-Known Member
MEMBER
Feb 4, 2013
806
522
I've seen worse.

I think the problem is that instead of discussing the main points of the argument posed, some go on a tangent, others answer indirectly, then others are simply there for the verbal acrobatics of the debate.

The last thing I seen was one member if we can discuss the points respectfully... because he felt some type of way by the answers... and that was met with more 'uncivility'...

I simply don't care either way... but its entertaining at times
 

Destee

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Family ... protect yourself from unreasonable dialogue, by using the ignore feature.

This option provides immediate control and relief to those who may need it.

There's usually more than one way to skin a cat ... solve a problem ... etc.

I don't think we have to throw the baby (destee) out ... with the bathwater ... :bath:

Loving Us!

:heart:

Destee
 

skuderjaymes

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Nov 2, 2009
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I have to disagree on the name calling, jamesfrmphilly infer calling people names by using outright lies, exaggerations, and misrepresentations in this thread, this kind of stuff hurts Destee and kills conversations. Now I know back in 2002 why I did not post because back then I felt it was too uncivil and moved on, this is why Destee have rules to encourage civility. This topic is a great example how some try to silence others they disagree with. There is so much talk about what white people do to us but the real problem is what we do to each other, there should be a greater benefit of the doubt and respect among ourselves. We are so quick to think the worst of our own people, attack them, accuse them, try to negatively turn them into a character and that ends participation and finding common ground on future topics. Observers see the uncivil climate and move on.

I don't do the drama stuff, back and forth with nonsense and waste my time on people who think their opinions are the only ones that are valid and have the only valid brand of blackness. They are those who can disagree and be civil and that is really a beautiful thing and it sets a good example of the kind of skills needed to be able to unify and grow based on the great majority of issues we agree on.


In view of the big picture my opinion on Destee does not make a difference so why deal with the frustration with those who can't respect it. There are better ways to spend my time.

I'm done, pissed and disappointed too bad this could not be a groove.

Best of luck and wishes and may peace be with you all.

Truth is.. many folks... just can't stand the idea of someone not having the same opinion as them.. and that is the real source of their frustration.. of your frustration.. it's not about being so-called "uncivil".. everything you have said about other people.. can be said about you by other people.. you gotta walk the walk if you gon talk the talk. Truth is.. it's really not that serious.. and you don't have to go back and forth with anyone.. that's your choice.. it's just a matter of folks like you wanting their answer to be crowned as The answer. That's just not the way online discussions go. It can be contentions.. it can be dramatic.. just like this thread you started.. but that's what happens when people from different walks of life get together to discuss controversial issues.. you should expect that.. and if you're skin is too thin to engage without becoming enraged.. then perhaps you should take a step back.. go back to spectating... or take a stroll through the Poetry forums.. leave the heavy lifting to the heavy-lifters..

and you know good and well you ain't going nowhere...

- peace.
 

Consciousness Raising Online!

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