Black People : Trying to learn

Destee

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Hi for the first time in a while! Question from a democrat white guy: What is the number one thing white people in the U.S. have to learn right now? What are we not seeing clearly?

Welcome Back! Good to see you in the house!

I can't see through your eyes, to determine what you (or white people) are not seeing clearly.

I think your other post in this thread is a great start :

I've been saying to my family and friends that we shouldn't be focusing on healing the divide with the right but should be directing all of our efforts to facing down racism as an urgent priority. It feels like we don't have much time to get this right, somehow.

Thanks for sharing!

:heart:

Destee
 

I_AM_HER

Active Member
MEMBER
Nov 7, 2020
34
20
Hi for the first time in a while! Question from a democrat white guy: What is the number one thing white people in the U.S. have to learn right now? What are we not seeing clearly?
I work in a small non-profit organization with 3 staff. Myself being the one black woman. With 30 senior advisory board members. One of the 30 is a black woman.

When Biden became presidential elect, my director, who is a white liberal woman, was over the moon. She sent out celebratory type emails and came in the office smiling from ear to ear and claiming we are at the end the rainbow.

There was a rainbow?

Things might be honkey-dory for her, but I don't think she understands that nothing is resolved for black people.

I don't mind her being happy about the occasion and that she wants to support. And is trying her best to do so.

However...Some days, I think she does try to hard, especially with me being there. It becomes uncomfortable and cringy. So much so that it just about ruined a potential non-profit partnership with a black organization I was working with.

Also, they have this horrible "diversity, equity, and inclusion" animation that they insist on showing that they made. I told them I would never show it to POC and I'm their DEI specialist. The video is very bubblegum and offensive because it tries way too hard but also not hard enough, if that makes sense..
but it comes off as inauthentic And it reflects my director's disposition.

I'd say, democrat white man, don't attempt to try so hard, unless you can back it up with actions while not causing more strife for black people.
 

john54

Member
MEMBER
Aug 21, 2018
23
9
I work in a small non-profit organization with 3 staff. Myself being the one black woman. With 30 senior advisory board members. One of the 30 is a black woman.

When Biden became presidential elect, my director, who is a white liberal woman, was over the moon. She sent out celebratory type emails and came in the office smiling from ear to ear and claiming we are at the end the rainbow.

There was a rainbow?

Things might be honkey-dory for her, but I don't think she understands that nothing is resolved for black people.

I don't mind her being happy about the occasion and that she wants to support. And is trying her best to do so.

However...Some days, I think she does try to hard, especially with me being there. It becomes uncomfortable and cringy. So much so that it just about ruined a potential non-profit partnership with a black organization I was working with.

Also, they have this horrible "diversity, equity, and inclusion" animation that they insist on showing that they made. I told them I would never show it to POC and I'm their DEI specialist. The video is very bubblegum and offensive because it tries way too hard but also not hard enough, if that makes sense..
but it comes off as inauthentic And it reflects my director's disposition.

I'd say, democrat white man, don't attempt to try so hard, unless you can back it up with actions while not causing more strife for black people.
A lot of democratic white people I know, and I'm guilty of this too, have a secret desire to be patted on the back by black people. It sounds like that's what's going on with your director. If it is, it's BS and no one should have to be pressured by that BS. She needs to stop trying to use you to feel good about herself.

I do it too though, because I have the bug, and I've hurt friends, even recently because of my ignorance and racism. Making a ****** up joke with a Chinese friend without thinking about it, making a facebook post trying to address racism while referring to black people as "them/they" when I was trying to be inclusive. I think many white people try so hard because on some level we know we're racist and we're afraid to let it show. To see it ourselves. And unfortunately, while we're trying to have our spiritual awakening we continue to be racist and cause harm.

I often only see my own racism once I've already caused harm and some one's pointed it out to me. ""We," "white people," need a way to learn these things on our own time, somehow.
 

john54

Member
MEMBER
Aug 21, 2018
23
9
Welcome Back! Good to see you in the house!

I can't see through your eyes, to determine what you (or white people) are not seeing clearly.

I think your other post in this thread is a great start :



Thanks for sharing!

:heart:

Destee
Thanks for the welcome and good to see you again! I felt last time, and this time as well, that there are a lot of wise people frequenting this forum. I appreciate the chance to post here/learn.
 

I_AM_HER

Active Member
MEMBER
Nov 7, 2020
34
20
A lot of democratic white people I know, and I'm guilty of this too, have a secret desire to be patted on the back by black people. It sounds like that's what's going on with your director. If it is, it's BS and no one should have to be pressured by that BS. She needs to stop trying to use you to feel good about herself.

I do it too though, because I have the bug, and I've hurt friends, even recently because of my ignorance and racism. Making a ****** up joke with a Chinese friend without thinking about it, making a facebook post trying to address racism while referring to black people as "them/they" when I was trying to be inclusive. I think many white people try so hard because on some level we know we're racist and we're afraid to let it show. To see it ourselves. And unfortunately, while we're trying to have our spiritual awakening we continue to be racist and cause harm.

I often only see my own racism once I've already caused harm and some one's pointed it out to me. ""We," "white people," need a way to learn these things on our own time, somehow.
I personally would not overthink using plural nouns. I do it as well when describing groups of people. It's all about context in which you are using.

I'd like to know what and when is white people's "own time"? Haven't they had enough time?
 

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