Should parents be in nursing homes or should the children take on the responsibility

miomina1

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Apr 19, 2004
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I'll tell you da truth...

Well, all that I'll add is this, My mother died last year and of course, I am still heart broken. I and my sister took care of my mother until I moved away, for reasons I won't discuss, but we meaning me,my sister,neices, nurses and a few friends did the best we could. We refused to put her in a nursing home, though It would have prolonged her life, It's hard to take care of a parent, but the Lord gave me strength and patience. I am planning to tell my kids and neices, when I get to where I'm not able, put me in a home, because even though it is expected, it sometimes isn't fair. I had to put a lot of things on hold, I gave up my happiness,freedom, and various other things to do what was expected and right. It's a heavy, heavy load, but now that my mother is gone, I wished many day that she was here and that I had the opportunity to be with her. I knew my mother would never be happy in a home, we all have heard of the abuse that goes on in those homes and I knew how overwhelming it was to take care of her.And I know also how much she appreciated her family (and yes there was some manipulation.)
 

MANASIAC

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Mar 10, 2004
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If Debra Continues her streak of aggrevation and Mr. Rodriquez Sr. conitnues clowning, they will be going to the nursing home on a scholarship.

However if they act right we can roll.
 

$$RICH$$

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in making these kind of judgements it's how we feel and what we
feel is best , by the illiness , family , life and other reasons
sometime it's best to do so and sometime we can handle the weight
but it's not that they are place'd in a home but how we visit and care
for them that really matters and count
 

MzBlkAngel

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Aug 26, 2003
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somewhere ova da rainbow....
So true Rich if it comes to placing a love one in a home
you MUST visit show you care and they will care
with my uncle i was there 3 times a day i feed him
breakfeast lunch and dinner. I didnt get to do this with my mom she pass the same day so it was almost a honor to take care of her baby brother
and the nurses had him spoil to the point he was getting stuff and attention the family is to give they was helping me. if he had a bad night they called me in the middle of the night...it really helps when family visit.
But you would do that i hope anyway after all they are family!
 

CarrieMonet

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Dec 26, 2003
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My grammy has been living with me for the last 4 years. She's not really eligible for a nursing home because she's not so ill that she has SKILLED needs...

But she is 76 years old and does not need to live alone. She is diabetic, she has lupus, and she has a few other issues. When her husband died she seemed scared and I asked if she wanted to live with me and my daughter and she said yes.

There was no hesitation about taking my grammy in. I know that if a car hit me tomorrow and I was paralyzed and needed care, she'd do the same for me in a heartbeat.

If she falls ill and needs me home every day. I have enough sick leave to be off for a year. My job provides FMLA for this type of thing and I would be home as much as possible, and hire nurses to come in and check on her when I'm away. But she will not be in a nursing home ever.

I'm sure one day I'll have to care for my father. He seems to be running himself ragged.

I can't speak for what others should do, but I'm the only child of my father, and I'm his mother's only grandchild...and I feel I could not let either of them go to a nursing home.
 

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