Man, it seems like only yesterday I was in my yard playing "Karate" and with toys with my long time friend Trenell aka Dip. I'm in college now which sucks but is something I have to deal with. Growing up, I would've never pictured myself as I am today. I was bad coming up and that is all I have to say about that. We grow up so quick and never realize what we have until it's gone. Sometimes I wish I was 12 again but as smart as I am now. Coming up, life was about just living without a care in the world. Now, as much as I hate to say it, it's about money and desire. People say Money is the root of all evil but I beg to differ. Desire is the root of all evil because if we didn't desire things, we wouldn't care about the money. My future is clouded and unclear. I have no idea what it will be like. I want to do this but can I afford to do it. I want to do that but can I will that really work? I'm really not in the position to be wanting a lot. Most people will say college is the ultimate experience and you'll like it better than high school. Do I really? College is just an alternate and faster way of realizing how much you desire this and that. I'm living in the "white man's world" as some may say. It may be true that in the United States, African Americans come up the hardest. That would probably explain the ignorance in our behavior. I love being 'black' or African American, whatever you want to call it, but I hate to see what has become of us. We give other races a reason to look at us how they do. This is not the 1800s, we have control over ourselves. We can do so much for the world. No one gives a **** about us. They say 'white people' are the most racist in the world but Mr. Jeff, the stepfather of my friend Josh, says that we are the most racist because we hate each other. Will we ever unite and dominate the world as we should? No. It can happen but it won't. The world is full of too many ignorant ****** and dumb *******. It's time for us to wake up and smell the **** coffee before our worlds come falling down. I try to make my family proud every decision I make. I want only the best for my family. That is what drives me. I want only the best for my race. That is another thing that drives me. Come on my brothers and sisters, take control and stop acting like ******. I wonder what's going to happen tomorrow. Well, nevermind, I'm not interested. I still have to deal with the last few minutes of today.