Brother AACOOLDRE : Live From the Apollo, AZ where the sun strips U Dry


Well-Known Member
Jul 26, 2001

Close to the Mexican Border: where the sun strips U dry

By Andre Austin

Stand up Comedy from Dre boogie

(Standing room crowd only. Dre Boogie approaches the dais to begin his Roast. The crowd applauds and welcomes him to the stage. Dre taps on an African wooden drum that reads made in China for the traditional good luck charm)

Dre boogie: Thank you, thank you very much. I’m so glad to be back at the Apollo.

Now you know I don’t come here to make fun of any immigrants. The Latins are the hardest working people in North and south America. We can’t do what we used to do no more. We have been spoiled. You take a co.c.k strong buck like King James out in da field under the blazing sun to pick some grapes. After the third grape plucked King James will come tumbling down being in complete exhaustion. The only ball he’s designed and breed to pick now in 2015 is the basketball not no grape ball.

You know I have been doing some reading and I was reading in the newspaper the other day. And I found out that our teenagers (And adults) don’t know much about history. The Europeans and Mexicans passed their emigration exams with a B+ or higher while those in the inner city flunked out with a D or less. I mean, while god **** they didn’t even know that Lincoln signed the Emancipation Proclamation or that King asked Kennedy to sign a second one. They don’t know black people are the oldest peoples here. Who you think the Folsom peoples are. No my brother I’m not talking about Folsom prison in California. When Columbus came to America who did he first see in some canoes? Some Jet black butt naked Native Americans is who he saw. And that leave me to turn to a point.

All black peoples must start studying their history and civilization from the time when we got on the Love Boat stacked like sardines. Oh yea it was a love boat for the white man but a boat of hate for the Blackman. I’m told at night they brought up some of the nude black females and took pleasure with them. They also brought up some men and freaked them out. But you see they were doing the work of Satan. Yes the one dressed in red silk pannie hoes. That outfit should have alarmed you to label him a suspect anyway. In the ancient Egyptian myth Set (Satan) sodomized Horus (Jesus) so that the Judges would rule he was disqualified from taking the Throne. But his mother Isis plotted and reversed the matter and placed the semen from Horus anus and put it in Satan’s porridge and the examiners found Satan to be unworthy to be king. This plot against the Blackman is going on right now in all the prisons throughout America and it started on the slave ship called the Love Boat. We must reverse the Love boat into the Amistad and take over the **** thing and bring Justice. You can be King/President now and not be 100% straight. Just ask Lincoln and Obama. But we have been dealing with this sh..t ever since God put a brick in Lucifer’s wing and he planted a seed and gave birth to the Roman Trinity of Vespasian, Titus and Domitian. The last two were Sodomites and prevented the Jews from having their homeland and encouraged them to come into their Kingdom/heaven without a penis. They got this ideal from Lucifer (Satan) who cut off Osiris penis and cycle went on in the Congo and in America with the lynching of the Blackman. I’m told that the Catholics in Belgium still symbolically eat the chocolate hands on the Congolese in memory of what King Leopold did to the holocaust of 10 million Africans there. Straight up work of Satan.

Remember Spike Lee movie School Daze? The movie started with slaves on a shipped stacked sky high on top of each other just like they have us stacked floor on top of floors in Housing projects. The roaches don’t even want to live up in there anymore. I’ve seen a bus load of them coming out of the projects with their suitcases, walking bow-legged with their antennas braided up saying:

“Naw man I can’t deal with this **** no more. The government didn’t used to give these MF’s vouchers for their Utility bills. Now the kids come in the bathroom at 3Am and turn on all the lights knowing our eyes are sensitive. They know we eat up all of their food and are now diabetic and our eyes are sensitive to the light and they just keep on Fu.ccking with us. I can’t take this **** no more I’m outtta here”-The Roach.

People out here have their history messed up and that’s why we are in trouble. You can’t know the cause and effect without knowing history. All NAACP members should read all the books of their co-founder W.E. B. Dubois. That would be like a nurse trying to be a nurse without having a biology class or a Math teacher not knowing the origin of Algebra. I say the NOI needs to learn the true history of W.Ford Muhammad. Karl Evanzz wrote a book on it and I’ve seen his presentation on C-Span. Ford/Fraud Muhammad was half white and his mother was a white Jew. Nevertheless, the NOI publishes the most anti-Semitic literature of any group in America. We have some of their associates like Malik Zulu Shabazz wanting to pin the tail on the white Jewish “honkeys”. I guess being a Zulu warrior from Shaka he wants to stick a spear up the white man’s *** just like the Devil did with his pitchfork looking like a gang banger in red pannie hoes. Shabazz has too much pit up anger and rage within his soul. He needs to take a blue chill pill and get rid of his red underwear too. I’m gonna help him out. I think Shabazz knows the comedian David Alan Grier from Detroit. Well David’s grandfather wrote the famous book Black Rage in the 1960’s. I think the distinguished Black psychiatrist Frantz fanon made some use of the work. We are the wretched of the earth but we will get nowhere burning down our own cots we sleep in. I’m warning you Shabazz: When Satan puts you in a cage you indeed in one. Because in the end those that got the rage do get put in the cage where all the jail birds sing on blocks of ice. And speaking of singing. Listen to Farrakhan: Don’t be bringing no Molotov cocktails to the MMM. Because when I get there I’m only bringing a brown paper bag with a can in it and a new calypso charmer cream cigarillos (The CCCC). This was named after L.F you know?

We need more singing and acting in our lives to relieve us of the stress and tension going on. Why can’t we go back to a time when all we knew of our musicians and actors was their age, birthplace and their zodiac sign? Remember back in the day Ericka Badu. Badu is now going all out: she’s on stage bending over in see through leggings with no pannies on, in a bathtub Bukee nakee, then she tops it off by running down Elm street stark naked. I ain’t mad at you, but who wants to be your boyfriend doing all of that. (Dre boogie raises his hands up). Yeah buddy I’ll knock that nappy dug out of here and plant a Dre flag up on that chocolate moon of hers. We love you Erika; we just can’t handle what you do. But I will still wax that beautiful big bootie like I was Michael Jackson doing the moonwalk sliding all up in it. And I know the NOI will not be inviting Erika back to perform at the 20th anniversary of the MMM. You fooled them once shame on you but not twice and make a fool out of L.F?

These artist now a days have no **** privacy. The computer hackers have breached cloud 9 and invaded all of our celebrities’ private photos. Look at what they did to my Nubian princess Gabrielle Union. When I saw the pictures I was like MLK saying: Mine eyes have seen the coming glory of the Lord. God ****. Union knows what she’s doing. She knows how to create some nude art work in da bathroom. I’ve been waiting ten years for some like this to happen. I went out that same night and bought be some color ink for my printer and I just let it roll. I made a triangulation of her photo shot in my bedroom room. I got her butt naked in three strategic locations: 1st one is at my bedside right near my pillow, the 2nd is near my lazy boy chair where I watch TV and the 3rd is on my mirror that’s on top of my dresser drawer. I want to be able to see this at all times. I’m thinking about having some wallet size pictures made. Whoever did this should get the Congressional Medal of Honor. I’m also thinking of making her picture into a cast and mold so I can make some chocolate Easter Bunnies cookies of Union to be eaten at Christmas and on Eater. Hey, if the Roman Catholics can eat chocolate hands of the Congolese how come I can’t eat the nude body of the Catholic girl Union. Its all good. Whats good for the goose is good for the gander. And I hear she’s bootie licious with a bag of chips and some groceries. But really dough its all to the fun and the good.

So I end my friends with more food for thought. We must turn our rage we first had on those slave ships so-called Love Boats and turn them into commercial fleets of international trade. Lets become Merchants and sea captains and enter into international Trade with China, japan and Nigeria and the rest. So let us get a map and insurance policies and plot a course and navigation of trade like our brothers the Phoenicians did. And we will never forget who had the insurance policies with specific individuals and corporations either. But we must move on and do what men must do stake a claim on the land, air and sea for our own destiny symbolically like Noah’s ark did to save their souls.

You have the freewill. So whats its gonna be. A trading ship or shackles, An Airplane on auto-pilot conducting business or remaining Air-heads in Adversity, being on the earth driving trucks supplying goods and services or being in the abyss of trepidation.

And to the Blackwoman. You treat your belly like a ship that’s carrying precious cargo. Make no trips to the HOOD to abort but plan on porting your goods on land in 9 months and get a manifest and certificate of your goods. While you incubate that God in your belly we will cease crawling on our bellies and assume the upright form of men and at the same time watch out for the white snakes in the grass. We don’t need no laws or prohibitions we come appealing to your heart because we love you.

I thank you for listening

(Live from the APOLLO theatre in Arizona High school Dre boogie everyone give it up once again for Dre Boogie)

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