Black Relationships : Is divorce the first option?

kente417mojo

Well-Known Member
MEMBER
Jan 22, 2004
3,756
35
There are so many people now getting married just to divorce a few months or years later. It's becoming so common now, what's the use of marriage? Some religions look down on divorce and some accept it better. The same goes for individuals. I was wondering what you guys thought about divorce as a whole. There are lots of people divorcing over what seem to be petty problems instead of sticking it out and working through them. What are some acceptable reasons (in your opinions) for divorce, and when do you have to just stick it out and work on your relationship...without jumping ship?
 

panafrica

Well-Known Member
MEMBER
Aug 24, 2002
10,227
193
The Diaspora
I'll be brief on this one...If you have only been married a few months/years, and you file for divorce, then you obviously married the wrong person. People get married for the wrong reasons: Money, fear of being lonely, etc. What are the right reasons? I can't say Kente..........that is really a personal choice. However if the marriage is over before it really began (a few months), those 2 people should not have crossed the alter in the 1st place.
 

Destee

destee.com
STAFF
Jan 22, 2001
35,999
9,898
betwixt and between
destee.com
Occupation
Website Consultant
Hello Brother Kente417Mojo ... i like that Mojo thang ... :wink:

Is divorce the first option? I think that depends on what the first violation is.

Even then, we all weigh things differently, so what may be a great violation to me, may not even rank with you.

How long do you remain in a situation that you're unhappy in? ... how much is your peace and joy worth? ... are there any guarantees? ... if i stayed married 20 years, then divorced, would the marriage be considered more successful ... than if i divorced after 1 year?

I realize i'm answering your question, with more questions ... and that might be because i don't know the answer to your question ... lol ... :)

Great Topic!

:heart:

Destee
 

kente417mojo

Well-Known Member
MEMBER
Jan 22, 2004
3,756
35
Thanks Pan and Destee. I know, it is a hard question. Just like most things, it's mostly an individual decision. I was wondering, because like to some people and some religions, it's looked at in a disgraceful way if a person gets a divorce for anything other than adultery. Some would say that's the only reason. Even if your mate gambled all the money, got hooked on crack and beat you, some would say try to work it out.
 

Queenie

going above and beyond
PREMIUM MEMBER
Feb 9, 2001
7,137
2,064
My two cents worth:

No, divorce shouldn't be the first option but it certainly should be one of them if all else fails and the couple realize that they've awakened from a fairy tale and reality doesn't seem so appealing. Do you know where most States now require that a couple attend premarital counseling? Well, the State of Michigan is considering making it mandatory for couples to also participate in predivorce counseling as well. In my opinion, for whatever reason a couple wants to get a divorce, let them. What value does it serve to force people to stay together when they don't want to? What I think people should be doing before they get married has nothing to do with it. Not everyone is like me and I know this. There will always be those who choose to do what they want and how they want so let the State make money off of them each time they marry and divorce. Unfortunately, if children are involved, they usually pay a greater price, but there are some things we can control and some we can't. Those of us that work in the family care field will just have to work harder to protect the children in situations like this. It's a two-edged sword.

My humble opinion....
Queenie :spinstar:
 

Create an account or login to comment

You must be a member in order to leave a comment

Create account

Create an account on our community. It's easy!

Log in

Already have an account? Log in here.

Thread starter Similar threads Forum Replies Date
Perfection Tunisia : In Context Series: Tunisia: Marriage, Divorce, and Foreign Recognition Tunisia 0
Liberty Black Entertainment : Afeni Shakur’s husband wants some of Tupac’s money in divorce settlement Black Entertainment 5
Kemetstry Black Entertainment : MASTER P AND EX INITIAL DIVORCE SETTLEMENT Black Entertainment 0
Kemetstry Black Entertainment : MARIAH AND NICK QUIETLY FILE FOR DIVORCE Black Entertainment 0
Kemetstry Black Entertainment : CHRIS ROCK FILES FOR DIVORCE Black Entertainment 0
S Black Entertainment : Divorce Court seeks to balance out this seasons overly negative showing of black men. Black Entertainment 5
Kadijah Black People : Jada hires divorce attorney Black People Open Forum 1
S Black People : Divorce Court: The Big Business of Black Conflict Black People Open Forum 21
MsInterpret Black Relationships : When Is Divorce Necessary? Black Relationships 41
Kemetstry Black Entertainment : Jada Says, 'What Divorce'??? Black Entertainment 0
Kemetstry Black Relationships : Children of Divorce Black Relationships 3
R Black Poetry : THE DIVORCE Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On! 3
S Black People : Forbes: Michael Jordan's Divorce Most Costly Ever Black People Open Forum 5
D Black Money Business Jobs : Emotional toll of divorce costs companies dearly Black Money Business Jobs 0
D Children of Divorce Still Feel Effects Twenty Years Later Black Parenting 0
Kemetstry Black Poetry : The Divorce Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On! 3
R Black Entertainment : Karen Melina White admits Divorce Black Entertainment 0
D Black Entertainment : Whitney wants a fast divorce. Black Entertainment 2
PurpleMoons Black Entertainment : Micheal Jordons wife files for divorce Black Entertainment 31
P Black People : Cover your assets in divorce Black People Open Forum 3
D Black Jokes Humor : Jill's Divorce Black Jokes Humor 3
S Black Entertainment : Snoop's divorce Black Entertainment 17
T Black Relationships : Is divorce inevitable? Black Relationships 38
S Black Poetry : this divorce is final....MY FRIEND Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On! 2
M Black Poetry : On Course For Divorce Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On! 3
Empress Q-Megaa Maat Black Poetry : Hiding Her was no more an Option! Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On! 0
Senegal Black People : Is Polygyny A Viable Option for Black People? Black People Open Forum 8
Liberty Black People Politics : Congressman Reintroduces Bill to Find Remedies for Reparations; Michael Eric Dyson Has an Option for Black People Politics 5
alcase Black People Politics : Is the Democrat(ic) party really the best option for black America? Black People Politics 30
Clyde C Coger Jr Black Sports : Despite disappointing Finals loss, Heat may be LeBron's best option next year Black Sports 2
N Black People : destee chat option Black People Open Forum 6
Black-king Support : Avatar URL option? Tech Support - Questions - Suggestions 2
Ankhur Black People : Without Single payer System , and public option where is the Reform in health Care? Black People Open Forum 4
Ankhur Black People : Public Option is Serious , so why the Games? Black People Open Forum 2
HODEE Black Poetry : SUICIDE... IS NOT AN OPTION... BY YOUR SELF Black Poetry - Get Your Flow On! 18
I Black People : Free the Political P.O.W.'s!! Violence is not only an option but a MUST at times! Black People Open Forum 1
G Black People : 'No money down' option disappearing Black People Open Forum 2
C Black People : Is "Stop Snitchin" mentality the safest option? Black People Open Forum 33
S Black Relationships : Polygamy: An option for you? Black Relationships 45
Similar threads







































Destee Chat

Latest profile posts

Ms Drea wrote on I_AM_HER's profile.
Welcome To Destee!! Love and Blessings!!
Sup, Fam. Peace.
Destee wrote on Ms Drea's profile.
Sister ... please forgive me, I just been so krazee lately ... I love you ... :love:
Destee wrote on Titoub's profile.
Hi My Friend! How are you? Welcome Home! :wave:
Destee wrote on Monetary's profile.
Hey Money - where ya been? Tell us everything ... :beer:
Top