Black Relationships : Is divorce inevitable?

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Edward Williams

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I'm a 24 year old wife and mother of one 7 moth old boy. We've been married for a little over a year. The problem is that he seems to be choosing his mother over me. Not to mention all the financial issues we've having (I had difficulty finding a job, so I enrolled in a technical program to train for a skill.. got 9 weeks left)... He said he doesn't think our marriage will last, and he also said he always felt that way.... That there's too much opposition.
Opposition to what?

(His family are the only ones complaining, mainly, his mother). He said he'll wait until I finish school and get a job before making his final decision, but I can tell he really doesn't want to be here.
Did you ask him if he's interested in building a relationship that is based on you helping him to become the best person he can be and also him helping you to become the best person you can be and the two of you...as a unit...as a team...helping your offpsring to become the best person they can be?

I know he loves me, but he seems to love his mom more. Nothing wrong with loving your parents, but what about his wife and son? Also, I'm not sure I would want to try and make it work. Our whole relationship, it's been me against his mother. She claims that he's not a man, that I'm controlling him, but every decision that was made, he had final say so. But everytime she says jump, he asks How high?............

I just need advice, words of encourgement, Bible verses, Qu'ran verses.. anything to help. Thanks.

Toya
 

Nasheed

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I'm a 24 year old wife and mother of one 7 moth old boy. We've been married for a little over a year. The problem is that he seems to be choosing his mother over me. Not to mention all the financial issues we've having (I had difficulty finding a job, so I enrolled in a technical program to train for a skill.. got 9 weeks left)... He said he doesn't think our marriage will last, and he also said he always felt that way.... That there's too much opposition. (His family are the only ones complaining, mainly, his mother). He said he'll wait until I finish school and get a job before making his final decision, but I can tell he really doesn't want to be here. I know he loves me, but he seems to love his mom more. Nothing wrong with loving your parents, but what about his wife and son? Also, I'm not sure I would want to try and make it work. Our whole relationship, it's been me against his mother. She claims that he's not a man, that I'm controlling him, but every decision that was made, he had final say so. But everytime she says jump, he asks How high?............

I just need advice, words of encourgement, Bible verses, Qu'ran verses.. anything to help. Thanks.

Toya
Sorry that u are going thru this. I went thru the same thing as you are now when I married my ex-wife. Her mother was horrible and constantly kept her nose in our buisness. I was never good enough and was always compared to other men. I married at 19 by the way. Eventually I got tired of it and confronted my ex-mother-in-law which did no good at all. Sad to say, at 42 my ex-wife still lives with her mother and has no man. The point of all this is, life is short and you must not waste it. Talk to ur husband and if that doesn't produce any results I believe u must do whats good for u. Ask urself this, r you willing to deal with the situation(without change) and if so, how long? Once you answer that 4 urself I'm sure u will know what 2 do.
Good Luck
 
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