Black Parenting : BRING BACK OLD FASHIONED DISCIPLINE!

edward67

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MEMBER
Nov 4, 2015
18
7
You asked a question

My answer as well

Always cool down first

Then decide if grounding your son can get your son's serious attention

And don't even admit to actually having done anything others might misuse to challenge your parental rights etc

fyi
 

Destee

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:hello: edward67 ... Welcome Welcome Welcome ... :wave:

Thanks for joining us and sharing!

How a parent disciplines their children isn't something i've spoke on often, but since you asked ... :thinking:

From the way you told the story, it sounded like you had never spanked / whooped him before.

Was this the first time?

I think by the time a child gets 16 they should have the basics instilled in them to the point that spanking is not necessary.

I'm glad it all worked out, had the effect you hoped for, etc.

I stopped spanking my Son at about 11 or 12, when my blows no longer physically hurt him, so i can't imagine doing this to him at 16. Even when he was 11 or 12, I realized that I had to come up with another way to move his heart to do the right thing, as spanking was absolutely ineffective in my house (for him). I am a Single Mother and that probably has a lot to do with it, he just grew bigger and stronger than me real quick - but not more wise - so I still had a few tricks up my sleeve to reign him in.

I think this story probably highlights some of the differences of having a Father in the home, that is in fact bigger and stronger than the Sons, leaving this option on the table longer than a Single Mother would have.

But I can't imagine watching him get that whoop'n - from your wife's perspective.

Now that my children are adults, I tell them all the time, don't ever spank my grandchildren (though I have none yet). I tell them there are other ways to reach the same end and my doing this was in error, as no child deserves to be beat up on. (My children are like, yeah rite, whatever Momma - this is your opinion after beating us all of our lives) ... :)

Parents should be able to come up with ways to get the children to be obedient, without causing physical pain.

Reading your story sounded like something out of a slave movie - slave gett'n beat - hands over their head! :eeek:

I'm glad it worked out, the Family is still strong and loving and such.

I'd take the opportunity to talk to him. Let him know that you did not want to do that, that it hurt you to do, and you hope the two of you never have to cross that bridge again. Reassure him of the love you have for him, etc.

Yeah ... talk to him ... kids will be kids ... and they shouldn't be treated like animals when they do.

It's sort of a sad story ... but you're right ... my Momma whooped me and i aint dead ... but dang ... :cry:

Thanks for joining us and sharing!

Much Love and Peace.

:heart:

Destee
 

Liberty

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Aug 28, 2015
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Take what they like best. Take all their electronics. The cell phones, games, computers, IPODs, televisions, radios, etc.
 

edward67

Member
MEMBER
Nov 4, 2015
18
7
i never hit my son. he is a successful adult now.
:hello: edward67 ... Welcome Welcome Welcome ... :wave:

Thanks for joining us and sharing!

How a parent disciplines their children isn't something i've spoke on often, but since you asked ... :thinking:

From the way you told the story, it sounded like you had never spanked / whooped him before.

Was this the first time?

Personally, I think by the time a child gets to 16 they should have the basics instilled in them to the point that spanking is not necessary.

I'm glad it all worked out, had the effect you hoped for, etc.

I stopped spanking my Son at about 11 or 12, when my blows no longer physically hurt him, so i can't imagine doing this to him at 16. Even when he was 11 or 12, I realized that I had to come up with another way to move his heart to do the right thing, as spanking was absolutely ineffective in my house (for him). I am a Single Mother and that probably has a lot to do with it, he just grew bigger and stronger than me real quick - but not more wise - so I still had a few tricks up my sleeve to reign him in.

I think this story probably highlights some of the differences of having a Father in the home, that is in fact bigger and stronger than the Sons, leaving this option on the table longer than a Single Mother would have.

But I can't imagine watching him get that whoop'n - from your wife's perspective.

Now that my children are adults, I tell them all the time, don't ever spank my grandchildren (though I have none yet). I tell them there are other ways to reach the same end and my doing this was in error, as no child deserves to be beat up on. (My children are like, yeah rite, whatever Momma - this is your opinion after beating us all of our lives) ... :)

Parents should be able to come up with ways to get the children to be obedient, without causing physical pain.

Reading your story sounded like something out of a slave movie - slave gett'n beat - hands over their head! :eeek:

I'm glad it worked out, the Family is still strong and loving and such.

I'd take the opportunity to talk to him. Let him know that you did not want to do that, that it hurt you to do, and you hope the two of you never have to cross that bridge again. Reassure him of the love you have for him, etc.

Yeah ... talk to him ... kids will be kids ... and they shouldn't be treated like animals when they do.

I don't know ... sort of a sad story ... but you're right ... my Momma whooped me and i aint dead ... but dang ... :cry:

Thanks for joining us and sharing!

Much Love and Peace.

:heart:

Destee
Thanks so much my sister Destee for taking the time out to respond to my post. Trust me when I say, my wife nor I are corporal punisher(s) of our sons. . . However, we will punish them for their "intentional" wrongdoings. Now, as kids, my wife would spank their behinds if they got out of line (public places, church, etc.) but normally, all I had to do is give them a "look" & whatever mischief going on was ceased immediately. Honestly, I can count the times I had to administer corporal punishment to any of our sons. I took my belt to our oldest son (now 22) who was caught holding down weed for a friend in his book bag @ his high school back then but I felt that was the ONLY resort in such a case. He knew better from the beginning & due to the seriousness of it, felt I had to deal with him in that manner. But whippings, in our household, are normally (always) a last resort.
 
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