Black Relationships : Black Sultan; Black Harem Girls Standby Equipment


Well-Known Member
Nov 25, 2002
Ventura, California
Air Traffic Controller
Black women are not standby equipment.

There are millions more unattached black women than unattached black men. Deducting from that total those black men unavailable due to substance abuse, unemployment, incarceration, involvement with white women and homosexuality results in a bleak demographic landscape for black women. Black men, certain types, will play their demographic advantage to the hilt by treating many black women as standby equipment. They play the system for what it's worth, and the pool of unattached black women is the system they play.

All too many black men choose to take on the role of sultans on the black social stage, the privileged few among the unattached many!! Black women are their standby-equipment harem girls, from whom they expect appropriate tributes. Being put on standby status means that the polygmaous sultan deems yo to be a harem girl whose services are not required for the moment. To wait on the shelf until his whim deems otherwise. Should the sultan tire of one harem girl, there are plenty more, and not all are black. Sultans cannot uderstand why any harem girl would find fault with their system. Their view is that harem membership is ample reward enough and black women should be gratelful. You have no LEVERAGE over these sultans, because they have no incentive to change. There's nothing to be gained. don't be fooled by the ficticious carrots they dangle to induce black women to pull their social lives along. They offer nothing of substance. SHOULD YOU LIMIT YOUR SOCIALIZING TO CERTAIN TYPES OF BLACK SULTANS, your only rewards will be empty promises and endless reassurances, as far into the future as the eye can see. Black women that make the mistake of taking on the role of standby equipment status leave themselves no choice but to contort their lives to fill the role expectations that go with being a spare tire.

Standby equipment is a role with no room for emotional growth. Do not trim yourself down to suit a sultan's lowly expectations. Standby status is a game you are predestined to lose. Closing your mind to reality in front of you blcoks you from moving beyond standby status. Walk out and find a game with better odds.

Solution to the Shortage of black men:

Millions of white men are interested in dating black women. 57% of single white men are open to dating interracially, compared to 51% of single black women. (Source Washington Post and Jet 10/1995).

White men who have never married, or are divorced, widowed or separated outnumber similarily disposed adult black women more than 3 to 1: 29.2 million white men, compared to 8.4 million black women. There's plenty to go around.

The odds are even better for single black women with associate's, bachelor's or advanced degrees. Single white men with such degrees outnumber similarily disposed black women more than 5 to 1: 7.2 million white men, compared to 1.3 million black women. There's even more to go around for black women with degrees. Remember, almost 60% are open to dating interracially.

Not all white men are great, however on average, the odds are that an adult white man who can handle being in an interracial relationship is likely to be mature in many dimensions, including the way he treats women.

Black women have a much greater workforce presence than black men, which brings them into contact with large number of potentially compatible white males, subconcious choices make it still less likely to see black women with white men than the other way around. Statistics show this figure is slowly changing.

Jan 22, 2001
betwixt and between
Website Consultant
:wave: Haaaaaaaaaaay Morenaseis :wave:

~ Welcome ~ Welcome ~ Welcome ~

Thanks for joining us and sharing such positive, encouraging information! While I'm sure there may be some that don't view it this way ... I'm ready to open an Interracial Dating Forum For Black Women! :wink: You may be interested in visiting a thread created by Amun-Ra, Is It Time, that speaks to this same subject.

If you noticed, this thread did not get posted immediately. We don't moderate posts but if you choose to include a poll during the creation of the thread, but don't follow through with the poll options ... the thread is sent to the moderator's queue for approval.

Again, thanks for joining us and please make yourself at home.




Lyon King Admin.
Mar 21, 2001
welcome within da house of destee's place
welcome to da flowz as i grace u from above
wit luv from da $$RICHNE$$


Well-Known Member
Nov 25, 2002
Ventura, California
Air Traffic Controller
Much of the anger of Black women stems from statements that lump all/"most" Black women into one attitude and way of being.

"Black men and women love the man and/or woman of your choice," says one post by a Black woman. "But don't tell me that you are doing it because I'm not good enough. To make this statement, you would have to get to know me as an individual."

Wayne Jackson says, "I just want to say to my sistas: don't ever question yourself as if some White/Asian/Hispanic woman has something you don't possess. A man of any race who gives that reply is not a true man, and he doesn't deserve the time it took you to even ask him the question."

TTaylor, a 35-year-old Black woman married to a Black man for 16 years, says, "It saddens me to hear Black men say they refuse to date Black women. To dismiss us is to dismiss yourself. For you to write off an entire race of women is truly asinine. If you took the time, you would realize that not all of any race is good or bad. That includes White women as well. They have issues just as we do but when you are at an advantage you deal with differently. I am not jealous or bitter because anyone who finds love and I mean true love is really lucky regardless of color. But to premeditatedly look for that love outside your race is self-hatred at its worst."

I wonder if TTaylor is a shrink because Dr. Grace Cornish, the psychologist and author of "10 Good Choices That Empower Black Women's Lives," will tell anyone willing to listen the same.

"It's a cop out on the part of a Black man to blame Black women for his choices," Cornish says. "If they have a preference, that's one thing. But then to downgrade your whole race of women is the most ridiculous thing on the face of the earth. I don't think these men have a problem with Black women. I think they have problem with being Black themselves and they take it out on Black women.

"Definitely, a lot of Black men struggle to reach a certain level and they never feel they have
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